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Pause





So much of what I used to do still isn’t available. That’s not a complaint. I don’t plan on protesting, as I feel Ohio, while making restrictions, has been pretty generous (maybe too generous) as far as being able to get out and about. Most of us wouldn’t have survived China, Italy, or the UK’s real lock-downs.
I have found other ways to fill up my days, but not necessarily all that productively. There have been some virtual film festivals that I might not have been able to attend that I was still able to either see the films or watch interviews with the filmmakers, which has been a nice upside to this insanity.
Mostly, though, I just feel stuck. That’s not anything new for me. I tend to stay stuck (in the past it was in toxic workplaces) until I just can’t stand it anymore and have to do something.
I’m trying to find that something.
There are two experimental sketches this time. The first illustrates my stuckness, or the pauses so many of us are enduring. The second required using “found footage.” A Creative Mornings Fieldtrip reminded me that the CDC has videos that are freely available for use (and, at least to my eyes, seem very creepy), and the Library of Congress has ample audio royalty-free. 
Once again, I really didn’t put in the effort I know was needed, hence the “sketches” note. I’m still getting back to doing creative work again, re-remembering my tools. Technically, the flowers aren’t found footage – I took it on one of my walks. The strong wind blowing the flowers down, but not completely, reminded me of how I feel when I watch the news these days – overwhelmed, occasionally calmed by either Dr. Fauci or Dr. Birx, then exhausted and fearful by agent orange. 

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