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My new least favorite word


There are so many new words and phrases that have been popping up over the last two years that I dislike, but I think none more than tribalism. Last night I was watching the PBS NewsHour, and while I generally appreciate the commentary of Shields & Brooks, I really wanted to throttle David Brooks when during the show he chalked up much of the problems with this week’s hearings to tribalism. At times he is able to rise above his political party affiliation, but to me this just showed that he’s another white guy that just doesn’t get it.
Wikipedia says tribalism is the state of being organized by, or advocating for, tribes or tribal lifestyles. In my opinion, that is not the problem because what we’re mostly seeing is differences between how women see things (and what they’ve experienced first hand) and how men (especially white privileged men) see them. We’re also seeing angry men striking back at women for the MeToo movement and for their chipping away at the long-held patriarchal system. Granted, there are many enlightened men who have evolved past their natural state, just as sadly a number of partisan women have shown recently that they’re willing to throw their daughters under the bus to save this deeply flawed nominee.
To me a tribe is much smaller than one whole gender population. David Brooks’ own paper, The New York Times, printed reactions from people across the globe, including many women finally coming forward with their own sexual assault stories, and realizing years later that what happened to them hadn’t been their fault. In last night’s PBS NewsHour broadcast, linguist Deborah Tannen highlighted the fact that Ford and Kavanaugh spoke at the hearings in very typical female and male ways, with Ford being polite and self-effacing, while Kavanaugh was belligerent and confrontational. Many others have pointed out that if Ford had behaved the way Kavanaugh had, she would have been labeled an angry, hysterical women, yet he apparently caused Trump to claim that the performance was exactly why he chose him as the nominee.
For Brooks, he said he came away from the hearing believing them both, which utterly baffles me, and not because I’m in a tribe, but because I’m a woman. I’ve learned over the years that being the gender I am, that I’m not supposed to speak up for myself or raise my or make men feel uncomfortable. Whereas men learn to fight for themselves, to take what they want, and disregard others that stand in their way. For me, I believed Dr. Ford, and after Kavanaugh’s performance, I believed he was guilty of the accusations presented.
That’s not tribalism and it’s not how things should be, but until more men evolve, learn to reflect, and willingly take responsibility for their actions, than sadly nothing will change. Saying this hearing was partisanship or tribalism makes light of sexual assault and people who use these excuses really should do some soul searching.

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